You can perhaps imagine how

You can perhaps imagine how cheerful I was this morning to check my regular dosage of post-Katy kitschbitch, only to discover a horribly unpleasant photograph of myself scanned in by the evil Mr Cornwell, who managed to capture me looking particularly long and moose-ish. I can’t remember the last time I have cringed with such horror at a photograph. Please god let me not look like this: Moose/Man.

The picture, incidentally, was taken at the recent house-warming of Toby, an old friend of mine, who – perhaps incongruously – does not live in a huge mansion full of suits of armour and secret passages, but in a rather nice little flat off England’s Lane in Belsize Park.