Since I am going to

Since I am going to have to be drearily positive for the next seven weeks as I scrabble around for a new job, I thought I may as well take this opportunity to moan about how appalling my life is at the moment in laborious and tedious detail.

1) Shortly to be unemployed. 2) No love life worth talking about since Max who, let us remind ourselves, is busy exploring the limits of desire with a series of teenagers. 3) I have to move out of my flat at the beginning of May and don’t know where I’m going to move to. 4) It is all cold and wintery outside. 5) I have bad hair and skin failure. [Summary: job/love/flat/hair/weather disasterous.]