Hello, my name is Tom. I’ll be your host tonight at plasticbag.org – so just relax and let me take care of everything. What’s that you say? What’s happening in the world today? I honestly don’t know madam. What’s that you say? That I should know? Because I’m running a weblog? What rubbish woman. Get your coat and get the hell out of here. I’m not here for your amusement. Jesus. And yes I was aware that Clare and Tom from Big Brother are expecting a baby. What do you think I am? Completely disconnected from the world?