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My net access goes down

My net access goes down for eight hours and I nearly snap from the strain of it all. I’m stuck at home unable to do anything – it’s like a limb’s been removed. Many episodes of Buffy later, I’m left considering the amount of crutches I need to be able to operate effectively at the moment, and whether or not it’s an attractive feature in a man to be gutted by a high-school awards ceremony with a toy umbrella covered in tinsel and marked with the words ‘Buffy Summers – Class Protector’.