Month: July 2002

So there’s this new feature on Amazon.co.uk where you can buy two things together that are apparently connected for a slightly lower price. It’s a really neat little feature that tries to determine what kind of things would interest you and encourages you to buy them together. Except it’s a little too good at it’s job I fear – buy “An erotic love story packed with stunning young men – for the gay man” and Amazon thinks very carefully about your interests and preferences and promptly spits out Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone. Too wonderful… What a combination… I wonder if his parents know…

I don’t have gay spending habits. This is the only assumption that I can come to. After going diligently through all of Amazon.co.uk and adding and rating all the things that I own, the DVD recommendations page for ‘Erotica’ shamelessly tells me that I need a DVD which will explain how I could better pleasure a woman. In my experience pleasuring a woman actually isn’t that hard – a Selfridges voucher normally works quite well. It’s quite satisfying to see videos called The Lover’s Guide – What Women Want and click firmly on the little button underneath that reads ‘not interested’!

There are some dodgy people in the world, with an exciting range of sexual interests that are more or less unfathomable to me. And then I’m sure that there are some things that get me off that probably would seem like the actions of a Martian to many other people. And then there are very very weird people. Warning: Less funny than excruciatingly gross!

Without Haddock I would never have stumbled up this one: Your Password Must Be at Least 18770 Characters and Cannot Repeat Any of Your Previous 30689 Passwords . [via James]

What the hell is it about the world that makes the word ‘gay’ so intrinsically funny to people? Currently doing the rounds: Spiderman will make you gay. I’ve got very very mixed feelings about this. I don’t think it’s overtly homophobic, but then I’m pretty comfortable with being a poof. The more I look at it, the more I think that it’s the kind of thing that drives young teenage poofs further into the closet, prolonging years of misery and giving kids at school yet another way to be vile to each other. What do you think?

So I was having a conversation with Matt Webb about my upcoming birthday when I will be thirty years old, and I said to him, “How do you think I can mention my birthday and link to my wishlist without seeming really cheap and mercenary?” And he said, “Since when did that stop you?” And you know what…? He was right…

I’m supposed to get my broadband today. Fast interhighweb access 24/7 from my very own living room. Will anything in the world ever be safe from my rampaging eye? Will I now be able to download all those huge OSX updates without being cut-off after half-an-hour? Only time will tell.

Updates: Broadband rocks. Am thoroughly enjoying it. I can now tell the world that the yet-another-sequel to Halloween looks really bad.

In an important defence against the erosions of privacy and the introductions of a surveillance culture – as well as in an acceptance of the gradual erosion of copyright – we acknowledge Hacktivismo who are shortly to announce a new protocol for anonymous, secure, private file-sharing.

Ok so I just had a dream that I was on a bus and I saw an huge poster on a bus stop which was blue and the name of a friend at the top with a picture of the friend kind of reclining at the bottom. I remember being suprised and remarking to the man on the bus with me that I knew the guy in the picture. I got a bit of a glare back. I guess he wasn’t very impressed. Weirdly this part of the dream was way more interesting that the bit where I had sex with Tom Cruise on a big bed on the ground floor of Selfridges.

If you’ve ever read upsideclown.com, then the only thing you need to know is tha the web is over – print is back.