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Lance Arthur's cat ate my foot…

So I was at a party and Lance Arthur was there, and I was really looking forward to seeing him and then he was wearing clothes that made him look … different somehow and I didn’t recognise him. That’s so terrible. I felt totally stupid. Anyway – to cut a long story short – we were staying at Leslie Harpold‘s flat last night and she was looking after Lance’s cat because Lance was going away, and his cat savagely attacked all of us during the night and so – in a weird way – I guess I’ve paid for my crimes!