Fighting with BT Internet's 50p

Fighting with BT Internet’s 50p a minute help desk is less than entertaining at the best of times. It’s particularly unthrilling when you are complaining that the connection number that you are supposed to use has been engaged for the last fourteen hours (checked by dialing the number and listening) and they suggest that the way to fix this situation is to change your control panel settings and check your modem. £5 (at least) worth of phone calls later, I am in a near-stabbing frenzy.