So I'm watching television…

So I’m watching television this evening and That ’70s Show comes on Channel 5. For the Americans amongst us I should point out that Channel 5 is to quality television what fart jokes are to Contemporary Dance Theatre.

The show is a favourite of regular subjectee Kerry – my pet American – and for this reason I decided that I should probably watch it.

It’s basically pretty funny, but suffers much more than normal from trans-atlantic drift. All UK-based people will understand this one – it’s what has happened when you are staring at the TV screen trying blankly to work out what “cooties” are.

In the first episode I watched there was an appearance by ’70s President Ford. The jokes at his expense were, I fear as incomprehensible to me as any joke I might be able to make about <whoever – the – hell – was – Prime – Minister – before – Thatcher – rose – from – her – icy – crypt> would be to an American.

Or indeed to me, since I clearly can’t for the life of me remember what his name was.

By means of retribution on the USA for the export of comedy that only they will understand, I hereby suggest the export of The Vicar of Dibley, which I watched last night, and which contained about a thousand Paul Daniels, Debbie McGee and Crunchie jokes – all of which I “fear” might be lost on our American cousins.

Let’s see them put that on an obscure cable channel and forget all about it! Ha. Revenge is sweet.