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Thoughts and Reflections on Friday Night:

My last day at Avondi filled me with a strange mix of relief and anxiety. Incidental contract jobs are never tremendous fun – you don’t have a lot invested in them, and they don’t have a lot invested in you. But nonetheless, it is money. And when your source of money goes away, well the fear starts up again.

Well, to counteract the fear – and extend the weekend – after a quick trip home I met up with two gay friends of mine, John W and Nick H and we went to see Broken Hearts Club. This was a pleasant surprise – a gay film that didn’t get too maudlin, didn’t deal too much with coming out and managed to deal with the thing I’m most interested in at the moment – the community of friends that you do or don’t develop and their relationships. And some of the relationship stuff kind of felt like a kick in the head – if only because I’m trying to make that mental shift from sleeping with people to going out with people without the person who actually convinced me I could make such a shift in the first place. And you know, sleeping with people is fun – but more about that later.

Film ends and I browbeat my colleagues into a visit to G.A.Y. where I am immediately obsessed by the cheap nastiness of my t-shirt which I accidentally bought earlier in the day. But within half an hour John, Nick and I are joined by Sam C on the stage in the middle of the dance floor. Remember – I’m new to this, I’ve only been to G.A.Y. once before and that was last week. Honestly, I had a great time. Anyway – halfway through the evening I met this charming shirtless gentleman called Claudio. He was fairly keen and after a couple of hours of mid dance floor fumbling, it became clear to me that this man would quite cheerfully claim the title of ‘best looking man I’ve ever shagged’ if I were to agree to take him home with me. Which is why I was startled when I realised that I wasn’t going to. That I was going to walk off, get a drink, find my friends and go home. I’m still trying to figure out why I did it. Didn’t feel right, I suppose.

Where did Meg and Jason go? Oh I don’t know, oh I don’t know. Oh, where did Meg and Jason go? Oh here they are with Judy.

Lack of imagination or taken down? Went to see Antitrust (more on this later – nyah ha ha ha ha) and in it is a company called skullbocks. They are often mentioned as having their own website, skullbocks.com, but when you try to visit the URL there’s nothing there.

We start today on a sombre note. Childhood hero to many and author of the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy, Douglas Adams, has died of a heart-attack aged 49. Discuss this horrible turn of events at Metafilter.

Oh the shame. Oh the embarrassment. To have my sordid lifestyle captured by camera. And I thought I’d managed to cover it up. But no, my dread secret is finally out. And what will Katy do, I wonder? How will she tell her boyfriend? Oh the shame. And the most terrible thing of all is that we were looking at naked pictures of Corny himself on her digicam at the time. [What the hell is he talking about? (click) GAH I’M BLIND!”]

Suddenly convinced that my flatmates are furious with me, I hide in my room all evening making grumpy faces and feeling weird. I emerge and while lingering at the sitting room door watch my flatmate giggle at Eurotrash. Offhand I ask, “can I just check whether you’re angry at me or not”. At which point she stares at me like I’ve just fallen from the sky in a duck costume and slowly says, “No, but I am mildly perturbed by you…” I leave the room.

Here’s a new game for you: The Interpretation of webcams through body language. The insight I have into mood here is astonishing.

Barbelith: In which Tom lets rip with his feelings on Oxford and Cambridge elitism in a very very long and ultimately unfulfilling post that doesn’t live up to its initial promise and needs fundamental rewriting: “On sabbatical from Oxbridge Academy, London“

All this stuff is a hell of a lot more complicated than you’d think. Does God play dice with the universe? No, but he made such an absurdly ridiculous place to live in that it’s impossible to tell the difference.